Craigslist ad - Check the requirements

#2
Alik said:
Apparently this band (drummer only) has some strange requirements for its new members. Go ahead and read it. :smug:
Would you reply to it?

El Paso Metalcore/Hard Rock band seeking Bass, guitar, and vocals
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El Paso Metalcore/Hard Rock band seeking Bass, guitar, and vocals (El Paso)

Local band (Modern Division) is seeking skilled and dedicated members to fill the following positions

Band style (Metalcore, Hard Rock, Punk Rock, Progressive Metal)

Guitar (good with leads and rhythm)
Bass (creative with the ability to sing/scream)
Keyboards/samples (creative with the ability to sing/scream as needed)
Vocalist (proficient with singing and the ability to scream when it fits the music)

Goal is to be able to practice and be show ready by the end of July.

Applicants must meet the following criteria:

- 21 years of age or older (no exceptions)
- Must be willing to answer extensive background/character questions
- No serious criminal records.
- No history of infidelity (sleeping with other dudes wives)
- Must have their own gear
- Must be military friendly
- Must be tobacco friendly
- Must be alcohol friendly with no dependence issues
- Must be drug free (exemptions may be made for Mary Jane with the condition it is not used around the practice space or any other band activities)
- Must be kid and pet friendly.
- Must have a steady source of employment
- Must have reliable transportation (practice space is located in NE El Paso)
- Must be willing to practice 1-2 times a week.
- Must be looking to write music with an uplifting message.
- Must be willing to make friends (we are not all business)(may include taking part in activities outside of practice)
- Must be willing to help market the band and contribute to band expenses.
- No SUPER LIBERALS or NAZIS

What? No BL Nazis either.
Oh, yeah. What band?
 
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#4
Stumbo said:
El Paso Metalcore/Hard Rock band seeking Bass, guitar, and vocals (El Paso)

Local band (Modern Division) is seeking skilled and dedicated members to fill the following positions

Band style (Metalcore, Hard Rock, Punk Rock, Progressive Metal)

Guitar (good with leads and rhythm)
Bass (creative with the ability to sing/scream)
Keyboards/samples (creative with the ability to sing/scream as needed)
Vocalist (proficient with singing and the ability to scream when it fits the music)

Goal is to be able to practice and be show ready by the end of July.

Applicants must meet the following criteria:

- 21 years of age or older (no exceptions)
- Must be willing to answer extensive background/character questions
- No serious criminal records.
- No history of infidelity (sleeping with other dudes wives)
- Must have their own gear
- Must be military friendly
- Must be tobacco friendly
- Must be alcohol friendly with no dependence issues
- Must be drug free (exemptions may be made for Mary Jane with the condition it is not used around the practice space or any other band activities)
- Must be kid and pet friendly.
- Must have a steady source of employment
- Must have reliable transportation (practice space is located in NE El Paso)
- Must be willing to practice 1-2 times a week.
- Must be looking to write music with an uplifting message.
- Must be willing to make friends (we are not all business)(may include taking part in activities outside of practice)
- Must be willing to help market the band and contribute to band expenses.
- No SUPER LIBERALS or NAZIS

What? No BL Nazis either.
Oh, yeah. What band?
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Well, I fail at 5 or 6 of the requirements.:( That and I've never played Metal (unless Iron Butterfly covers count:cool:. And practicing 2 times a week while keeping a day job?
 
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#6
Stumbo said:
Oh, yeah. What band?
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LOL Yeah what band?

This gives me an idea. I should post a CL add that says: Established band seeks; guitars, drums, keys, horns, percussion, backup vocals to join bassist vocalist in groovin' R&B/Southern Soul Band. Transportation a must. So who lives near me and can pick me up? We will no doubt have many well paying gigs in top local venues. Who has contacts with a few?

I'm very well established or at least I once was so this would be just like the Blues Brothers putting "The Band" back together. Good name brand gear a must, appropriate appearance for the genre, leave your piercings behind. Pay to be split equally but all movie rights are mine. Serious inquiries from serious professionals only. Posers need not apply.....you know who you are. ;)

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
 
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#8
dreamadream99 said:
Yeah, I didn’t have to read the requirements. If they are looking for bass, guitar, keys, and a lead vocalist, this isn’t a band. It’s a drummer. And there are no booked gigs yet.

That’s all I had to read. The rest is just Satanic icing on the fecal cake.
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And no original songs to play?

What happened to the original band members?

Sounds more like a cult?
 
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