- Nov 27, 2003
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- Rogue luthier employed at Knooren Handcrafted bass guitars
Yes, with from Johnny Cash singing about being incarcerated after "Shooting a man in Reno, just to watch him die" all the way up to Gangsta Rap in the late eighties, bragging about being a criminal has been part of the lexicon in popular music for a long time. Although, it has to be said, there are equal amounts of songs about a Gangster seeking redemption, such as "Desperado" by The Eagles.
But let's talk about the songs which poke fun at this trope, songs about those criminals so dimwitted, they'd get lost in a telephone booth.
So to start it off, here's the 1981 hit single "Don't come stoned and don't tell Trude" by Max N Specs, who are two American guys getting their big break in Europe. The song is a VERY early hip hop spoof song about two small time crooks organizing a heist, which would have gone perfectly, if only one of them hadn't rattled it all to his girlfriend. Something he was told NOT to do...
Next up, and again spoofing the Hip Hop genre is the German band EAV with their song "Ba-ba-banküberfall" in which our leading subject has fallen on hard times and in his desperation, decides to go rob a bank. I'll translate the lyrics as closely as possible.
"My woollen sock in empty and so is my piggy bank
I haven't eaten a schnitzel in weeks by now
My very last check is gone, I can't pay the rent
The bank won't give any more credits
Yesterday, my mother disowned me
And debt collectors are busting my door down
To be short, I've run out of options
There's only one thing left to do:
To go and rob a bank
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
The evil is always and everywhere
I pull a stocking over my head
And make my way over to the bank
I walk the "Robbery march"
And stuff my finger in my coat instead of a gun
I can't stand the sight of blood
And that's why I have to bluff.
I scream, "EVERYBODY HANDS IN THE AIR, THIS IS A ROBBERY!
SO YOU'D BETTER COOPERATE OR THINGS WILL GET MESSY!"
And that old lady turns around and says
"Young man, please await your turn, okay?"
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
The evil is always and everywhere
After half an hour, I'm finally at the till
My finger has cramped up with me keeping it stiff at this time
I shout, "NOW OR NEVER, GIVE ME THAT CASH!"
The cashier looks at me and goes, "What's the problem here?"
I say "I'm hungry and thirsty,
And without a job, I am the evil bank robber here!"
The cashier goes "No, what the heck are you thinking?"
"Okay" I reply "I want to open an account."
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
The evil is always and everywhere
But let's talk about the songs which poke fun at this trope, songs about those criminals so dimwitted, they'd get lost in a telephone booth.
So to start it off, here's the 1981 hit single "Don't come stoned and don't tell Trude" by Max N Specs, who are two American guys getting their big break in Europe. The song is a VERY early hip hop spoof song about two small time crooks organizing a heist, which would have gone perfectly, if only one of them hadn't rattled it all to his girlfriend. Something he was told NOT to do...
Next up, and again spoofing the Hip Hop genre is the German band EAV with their song "Ba-ba-banküberfall" in which our leading subject has fallen on hard times and in his desperation, decides to go rob a bank. I'll translate the lyrics as closely as possible.
"My woollen sock in empty and so is my piggy bank
I haven't eaten a schnitzel in weeks by now
My very last check is gone, I can't pay the rent
The bank won't give any more credits
Yesterday, my mother disowned me
And debt collectors are busting my door down
To be short, I've run out of options
There's only one thing left to do:
To go and rob a bank
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
The evil is always and everywhere
I pull a stocking over my head
And make my way over to the bank
I walk the "Robbery march"
And stuff my finger in my coat instead of a gun
I can't stand the sight of blood
And that's why I have to bluff.
I scream, "EVERYBODY HANDS IN THE AIR, THIS IS A ROBBERY!
SO YOU'D BETTER COOPERATE OR THINGS WILL GET MESSY!"
And that old lady turns around and says
"Young man, please await your turn, okay?"
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
The evil is always and everywhere
After half an hour, I'm finally at the till
My finger has cramped up with me keeping it stiff at this time
I shout, "NOW OR NEVER, GIVE ME THAT CASH!"
The cashier looks at me and goes, "What's the problem here?"
I say "I'm hungry and thirsty,
And without a job, I am the evil bank robber here!"
The cashier goes "No, what the heck are you thinking?"
"Okay" I reply "I want to open an account."
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
Ba-ba-bank robbery
The evil is always and everywhere
