What is your significant other's attitude towards your bass playing?...

What kind of vibes are coming your way?

  • Supportive

  • Indifferent

  • Hostile

Results are only viewable after voting.
#21
Old_Noob said:
"Its better than you going to the bar every night."
Click to expand...
I am the guy that voted 'hostile'.
My wife equates playing in a club to going to a bar, even though I rarely drink maybe one drink or maybe 2 beers. There's no alcohol in our house which is fine with me, because I don't partake unless we're going to a party or other social event.
Going to a bar = sleeping with another woman and divorcing her. We've been married for 30 years, and in all other aspects, everything is cool, even the weekly jam session I attend.
I couldn't ask for a better, more beautiful woman. She just has this attitude that I can't change.
It is what it is, so as long as I can practice my bass and do the weekly jam thingy, I am golden.
I don't play in bars anymore and have no desire to, really.
Those years that I did were not enjoyable at ALL.
 
#23
I voted indifferent. Really, it's maybe a little more positive than that, but not by much. She's not really into music other than the pop songs that she listens to with out daughter. My interest in playing is more puzzling to her, but there's definitely no hostility or negativity. It helps that I don't annoy everyone by shaking the house to its foundations. Also, were in a fortunately position that we both make good money, and I don't spend much on anything. It might be more contentious if I were a gear hoarder, but I'm not.
 
#24
Met my wife for the first time at a gig. She was best friends with the FOH girl. (Lights, hubby did sound) Her husband had just split (idiot) so she was hanging with her friend but not having much fun. Things weren't going well between me and my wife then and we ended up separating a few months later. About a month after that, FOH guy calls me up to see if I want to go to a Bills game. He needed a fourth (a date sorta) because his brother had backed out and the woman who was to become my wife was going. I said "sure" and the rest, as they say, is history. And talk about being supportive; about six months after we started dating I was talking about maybe getting a 5-string bass. My then girlfriend and wife-to-be offered to buy me one out of her divorce settlement money. I still own that bass and it is my main player. (Carvin LB-75) Still married (25 years today!) and still supportive although she doesn't come to most gigs any more.
 
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#26
My wife is completely supportive. We have more basses hanging in our house than paintings, mirrors or photographs. She encourages me to play whenever I want to and she is excited when opportunities arise for me to work with other musicians. She understands that this was a vital part of my existence for decades before we even met and she has helped me accomplish so many of my goals just by being cool about it.
 
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#29
My wife hasn’t come to one of my shows for probably 5 years. And I’ve been in a few bands during that time, meaning I’ve joined a band, rehearsed, done gigs, and she hasn’t seen the act or met the fellow musicians multiple times over. It’s rough when significant others come out and ask where she is. I make lame excuses. Indifferent is a polite term and I’ll go with that. She did notice one of my basses and asked, “Is that new?” I said, “What? That old thing? Nah..”
 
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#32
My wife lives somewhere in the supportive/indifferent range. My childhood ADD manifests in my hobbies as an adult, and I’ve had too many to count. She is perfectly happy to sit on the couch and listen to me noodle, although she doesn’t hear much of it (She’s Deaf/hard-of-hearing). I’ve stuck with bass because I’ve always wanted to learn, and because I enjoy challenging myself.
 
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#34
I voted indifferent but in reality certain aspects teeter on supportive and hostile.
With my amps, pedalboard and bass’s in the living room there’s an occasional eruption of hostility.:bored:
With leads to gigs plus, rehearsals/jam sessions there’s sincere support.:smug:
With my technical progression and learning new material she hardly notices.:rolleyes:
Bottom line, I’m not giving up my musical passion and aspirations for anyone or anything.
“Selfish”, you say? Damn right! Been down a lot of roads and I know what is good for me and what’s not.:cool:
 
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#35
Claymore said:
An informal poll to see how much support, or lack of, most of us are getting at home. Just to clarify the poll boundaries...

Supportive could be anything from "Play me something, honey" to expressing a sincere interest in basses you like or the music you're listening to or just sharing your enthusiasm for bass in general. :)

Indifferent would be like "That's nice, dear" (said with glazed expression while surfing the internet) and just a general whatever, I don't care sort of attitude. :yawn:

Hostile could be something as subtle as rolling their eyes when you say you're going to practice all the way to throwing dishes at you and everything in between. :mad:
Click to expand...
Hostile. She's hostile to anything that doesn't involve her. Even when I involve her. :)
 
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#37
When I was married, the wife hated it. She thought rehearsals were just parties. Invited her to come to one, or just surprise me and show up. She never did. Her nagging caused me to quit music for several years but then she divorced me. It was my mom who got me into playing again. I've been happily single, and except for this year (4 shows, thanks Covid for all you do), play as often as possible. :bassist:
 
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#38
Supportive. My GF (is girlfriend the right term in your early 50s?) loves that I play music. Loves when I pick up a guitar or Uke and sings to her. Loves to sing along together even though we’re both total hack vocalists. Loves giving me space for my hobbies/friends and likes the same for herself.

We balance our shared life and our independence very well.
 
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#39
Engle said:
Mine is pretty cool, but doesn’t go to many gigs cause she’s heard all the tunes 1000 times. (Rehearsals at my house)
When I ask if my practicing bothers her, she says she doesn’t really hear it anymore.
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This is pretty much where my wife is, she only comes out to big or particularly cool gigs. And she says she doesn’t listen but she does complain about some of the more esoteric, less advanced projects I am in, negatively comparing them to my more established, polished bands. She plays piano and djembe, and also a little bass now and then, but never liked performing and decided to stop doing that. She definitely supports me in terms of never complaining about me practicing or bands rehearsing, nor about any gear or pedals that I buy.
 
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