What is your significant other's attitude towards your bass playing?...

What kind of vibes are coming your way?

  • Supportive

  • Indifferent

  • Hostile

Results are only viewable after voting.
#41
Mine is somewhere between indifferent and supportive. It goes like this. She's glad I don't have a more expensive or dangerous hobby, and she likes the side cash. But going to my gigs stopped being a priority months after we met. She tolerates my music choices, has little to no understanding of why I play and does not really show an interest. If I nail a part I have been practicing for a while, nothing.

Music is not a big part of her life and I accepted that at the altar. She has other redeeming qualities, at least.
 
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#42
Claymore said:
An informal poll to see how much support, or lack of, most of us are getting at home. Just to clarify the poll boundaries...

Supportive could be anything from "Play me something, honey" to expressing a sincere interest in basses you like or the music you're listening to or just sharing your enthusiasm for bass in general. :)

Indifferent would be like "That's nice, dear" (said with glazed expression while surfing the internet) and just a general whatever, I don't care sort of attitude. :yawn:

Hostile could be something as subtle as rolling their eyes when you say you're going to practice all the way to throwing dishes at you and everything in between. :mad:
Click to expand...
I don't have a SO but I still wanna see the poll results!
 
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#43
Claymore said:
An informal poll to see how much support, or lack of, most of us are getting at home. Just to clarify the poll boundaries...

Supportive could be anything from "Play me something, honey" to expressing a sincere interest in basses you like or the music you're listening to or just sharing your enthusiasm for bass in general. :)

Indifferent would be like "That's nice, dear" (said with glazed expression while surfing the internet) and just a general whatever, I don't care sort of attitude. :yawn:

Hostile could be something as subtle as rolling their eyes when you say you're going to practice all the way to throwing dishes at you and everything in between. :mad:
Click to expand...

My wife says I'm not allowed to not be in a band because I'm pretty miserable when I'm not gigging. Granted covid had made me kinda miserable.

She can get a little hostile when I buy too much crap though!
 
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#44
jmattbassplaya said:
she was borderline hostile towards my music
Click to expand...

Ouch. And if you weren't a musician, there would have been something else wrong with how you spent your time.

I am fortunate. My wife is supportive of all of my expensive, complicated hobbies. She participates to the extent of her interest, which is sometimes on par with mine, though usually less. But it's always nice to have a partner for scuba diving, model planes, laser cutter arts & crafts, brewing beer, whatever.

I picked up bass and electric guitar at the same time, just about 3 months ago. She is interested in learning both too... though she is focusing on acoustic guitar. Her dad played and I think she always regretted not learning more about it when she was a kid. So we have a couple of modest acoustic guitars now too. We're also taking singing lessons because she loves karaoke. We have a fair home setup, and she can already sing pretty decently but never had formal coaching. (When I sing, it sounds like someone is electrocuting a horse.)

She's not as dedicated a researcher or self-learner as I am so she likes me to keep ahead on the guitar and teach her... kind of the blind leading the blind around here. But it is fun.

I told her that I wanted to spend $1k on a multi-effects box (that I don't need and will barely understand) and she was supportive, so... can't complain.
 
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#45
I'll say supportive since she bought me 2 of my favorite basses. And the fact she let me claim part of our newly finished basement for my music stuff. BUT, she's not that keen on my rehearsals, shows, practicing, etc....and I'm cool with that.
 
#47
I'd say it's complicated. I voted indifferent. I've been married 22 + y years. When we first met, and before we had kids, she was fine with me playing and came out to some gigs. She loves music and can sing and play piano. I even played guitar to accompany her at her office Christmas party one year. I was not pressured to quit my band when my first son was born almost 11 years ago. I chose to quit about six months in because I wanted to be home with them (and music for me is only a hobby/passion, not my livelihood).
I will say that in the years that followed if I mentioned wanting to get back in a band again, let's just say she has not been supportive. I've only recently started back playing bass after 10 years (I've been playing guitar at home during that time), and I don't really have the time right now to commit to a band, but I don't think the idea will go over real well when that changes. I suspect at this point she resents and is jealous of the social outlet it would provide me, because we moved 5 years ago to my hometown and she left behind most of her friends. She hasn't really made any here, and so I think she expects me to join in her discontent.
 
#48
My Ex was hostile, pretty much jealous of any attention I’d pay towards anything but her. Well, she got her wish after we split, sold all my gear to help get back on my feet after that fiasco.
The Woman I’m in a relationship ship with now, for almost 2 years, she’s very supportive. Compliments my playing, complimented the two basses I’ve bought this year. She has no idea how much I needed that.
 
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#49
Generally indifferent in my case though she's happy I enjoy my hobby and has encouraged me to buy a couple of basses as birthday presents so she's great in that respect but she does get disgruntled when I get into a project and it eats up a lot of my time, which is fair enough I guess. D
 
#51
My wife is pretty supportive of my music making, and part of that is due to the good friends we’ve made through being in bands. We don’t go to live shows very often, so she comes to all my shows for a good hang. She’s quite a good vocalist herself, also, and she’s sang on a few recordings my band has made. She plays a little keys and ukulele too. Every now and then she and I will have a jam and write a song or two for fun. I don’t try to make music a career, and I think it helps keep a good life balance when it’s only one practice a week and a gig now and then. The only part she probably doesn’t love is the money I spend on gear, so I generally try to fund gear by selling gear I don’t use as much, or buy gear I know I can flip for a profit.
 
#54
Mr Cheese said:
I don't have a SO but I still wanna see the poll results!
Click to expand...
5F87A939-3D36-4E0B-A65F-4831D4E54D70.jpeg

...at the moment, here is where it stands. For anyone else who doesn't currently have a SO (which can be a blessing in disguise), feel free to vote "indifferent" to view the results. I don't think that will skew the poll overly. :cool:
 
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#56
She joined the band as lead vocalist and is now a fan favorite wherever we play. She had grown to not enjoy watching me play from the audience, knowing she had more to offer than whatever singer was fronting the band.
 
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#57
Indifferent. She's grown to realize (after 30 years) that I must have something that I'm using to push/stretch myself. I do work to keep up with my chores around the hut. I also keep the cash outlays to a minimum. It also helps that I ALWAYS play through headphones. I also have a fairly well tuned sense of when I need to just hang in the room with her - meaning there's a vibe in the house that she has something on her mind that needs to come out. Disappearing then to go play is not a good idea.
 
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#58
My sig-o, partner, whatever, is an arts therapist so she's generally music and arts supportive. When she was 4 years old her father took her to NYC, the Bluenote, and Toots Thielemans gave her a ride on top of his shoulders. (the chromatic harmonica player of chromatic harmonica players, check him out with Bill Evans and Jaco P) When she was working as a casting agent in the same NYC she discovered Nell Carter singing in a church in Harlem. Convinced her to audition for Broadway show Ain't Misbehavin' the songs of Fats Waller and the rest happened
 
#60
My GF is 55, She isn't a musician but enjoys music, therefore as my main musical endeavor is managing a working 'oldies" cover act she is the perfect target audience & her input/song suggestions are usually spot on.

As many know the key to success in the cover music business is keeping the women in the crowd happy!
 
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